The Invitation

The beautiful Ms. O spoke many of these words at the end of last year during one of her classes. It is a reminder for what is to come this year . . .

The Invitation
Oriah ~ Mountain Dreamer

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.

It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shrivelled and closed from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it, or fade it, or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own; if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, be realistic, remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself. If you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. If you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see Beauty even when it is not pretty every day. And if you can source your own life from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand at the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, 'Yes.'

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone and do what needs to be done to feed the children.

It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire with me and not shrink back.

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

Emotional Agility

The kind of dramatic changes you can create in your life only happen through persistent, constant, decisions on a moment-to-moment basis. Relentless determination to experience life through a different filter with different outcomes does not happen magically. You have to dig down and see all the darkness along with the light. You have to accept all the little dirty corners along with the beautiful windows. You have to realize and verbalize the kind of person you actually desire to be, and then make the changes through every moment of your life. Anything less and you will never achieve what you are aiming for. This article outlined the exact process I took upon myself about 3 years ago. But I didn't call it anything. And I didn't go to a therapist.

Solitude. Writing. Yoga.

If anything, it is a great article to bookmark and reference when I need to be reminded of... everything. Damn. So good.

http://www.fastcompany.com/3020373/leadership-now/4-important-things-about-mindfulness-you-didnt-realize

All of the Games. All of the Thrones.

Here is to having much more information than I realized, stored away in my brain from forgotten classes. Apparently I can put it to good use in a field that I have never been educated. Seriously, I never thought I would use my Lean training for college level healthcare curriculum review. Life, you are so weird.

Here is to playing like I hold a royal flush. Saying yes to everything. Going for it.

Yes, to yoga studio desk job of sweaty zen OCD awesomeness.

Yes, to STEM non-profit that is giving me a VEX robot to program, and handfuls of inner city high school students to teach about engineering.

Yes, to applying for the Executive Director position for Career and Technical Education in Fulton County.

Yes, to accepting my placement in the Peace Corps. After all, they don't want to deploy me until June 2014, and that is a looooong time from now.

Yes, to random curriculum review jobs that somehow utilize my knowledge base even though the two fields seem terribly unrelated.

Yes to getting out of summer vacation mode and into making a life for myself mode.

I will play all of the games. I want all of the thrones.

Also, the Imp is allllmost my favorite character. At least in the top 3.

Education, Sports, and Salary

I used to think it was home schooling and absence of athletic ability that caused my lack of team spirit. Not that I don't like working in teams, but being a sports fan. My college did not have a football team, and honestly, being a Masters student doesn't leave you much time to get into the undergrad fanaticism. So, I am not really sure where it started, but the more I see how skewed the monetary allotment is in higher education it makes me almost nauseous. And gives me no reason to want to be a fan.

After reading some articles that back up and prove my feelings for the past 15 years I am even less inclined to support college football--never mind the fact it is almost like a religion in the south which is bs. How about you pour that funding into your science, health, arts, and engineering departments? Make sure those professors and equipment are taken care of and updated as often as your football team facilities. Bet you would have more graduates that can contribute to society instead of the social arena of pro sports. Sweet Jesus.

Who's Your Highest Paid Public Employee? 

Let's Separate the Schoolin' From the Sports

P.S. Someone asked me why I felt the way I do about sports. They also felt the need to tell me they were going to 'fix' me and my lack of support for teams. While I never got around to answering the question I am pretty certain I don't need to be fixed. Boom.

Everything and Nothing At All

There are two basic emotions that we operate from: Love and Fear. Everything else is a trickle down feeling.

In reflection of some recent (extremely emotional) personal events and what happened in Boston today I can't help but return to this thought.

Kids are cruel. I see it every. single. day. Adults are simply kids with more access to tools to express their emotions. 

If you react to someone who is different or quirky or weird or unique with an attitude of fear then they learn to be feared. They learn to be afraid. 

And when people are afraid they either withdraw or they lash out. 

So, the next time you want to pass judgement on that person who talks differently, walks differently, or has a commentary different from your train of thought, just pause and reflect. What will you teach them with your actions? Will you teach them fear or will you teach love? 

The craziest thing about all this is how it is against our nature to push back at someone who is nice. Our innermost being of humanity reacts to what is thrown it's way. Be terse with the waiter and you get bad service. Yell at the guy who is going too slow (for you) and they will go slower. Try it.
I don't like living in a world where kindness is met with surprise. 

Be the change you wish to see in the world. Not the preacher of it. You are *not* entitled to jack anything. 

My heart goes out to everyone in Boston. I am deeply saddened by it and humbled by the enormity of our society. My world is but a mere speck and yet I am the sun. Sometimes it is easy to get lost in our lives and forget there are so many other people out there, living simultaneous, unattached, and equally important lives. Hrm. Life. You continue to elude and overpower me. 

In summary, which has nothing to do with this post, Twilight is the most horrifically terrible movie in every way possible: acting, script, color saturation, cinematography, special effects, plot, etc. But, they paid someone to get a hell of a sound track--of which I am shamelessly listening to this week. I really like this song: 

First Name is Last Name

Phillip Phillips. The kid has a pretty decent album, I dare say. I had no idea he was from American Idol--which shows you how much I am tapped into pop culture. I was burnt out from his song "Home" which is horrifically overplayed on the radio, and wasn't really interested in exploring him any further, but a reputable friend suggested I take a listen.  Thanks, Tim, that was some good advice :)

All I can say is that he has beautiful lyrics, and sounds a lot like Dave Matthews. Nothing beats a guy with a guitar. Not quite a swoon, but I dig. Very much. Here is a taste of his sound past what we hear once an hour on top 40.

Gone, Gone, Gone.

The Perks...

...of Being a Wallflower. Is a much better movie than I expected.

"You accept the love you think you deserve."

"It's not about where you came from, it's where you choose to go from here."

Nailed. It.

(fun soundtrack, too)